If you want BS or Political Correctness you have come to the wrong place. FAQ How can you be an atheist Jew?
April 22, 2006
Another Picture of Me and Daisy
I look a lot smarter when I have my glasses on. These days I have my glasses on pretty much all the time, except when I'm sleeping or in the shower. I guess I don't look that smart in the shower.
Some border collie humor:
How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?
Border Collie:
Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
Golden Retriever:
The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?
Dachshund:
You know I can't reach that dumb stupid lamp!
Rottweiler:
Make me.
Lab:
Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?
Malamute:
Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
Jack Russell Terrier:
I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
Poodle:
I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Cocker Spaniel:
Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Doberman Pinscher:
While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.
Boxer:
Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark......
Mastiff:
Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.
Chihuahua:
Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
Irish Wolfhound:
Can somebody else do it? I've got this hangover.....
Pointer:
I see it, there it is, there it is, right there....
Greyhound:
It isn't moving. Who cares?
Australian Shepherd:
First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle....
Old English Sheep Dog:
Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?
German Shepard:
Alright, everyone stop where you are! Who busted the light? I SAID, "STOP WHERE YOU ARE!!!"
Hound Dog:
ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz
Cat:
You need light? Tell hit to someone who cares. (Thanks Beep Beep for the addition.)
The truth about border collies. (Click the link if you have a border collie or used to have one)
How about a timely cartoon?:
Doggy IQ based on research by Dr. Stanley Coren author of The Intelligence of Dogs
1) Border collie
2) Poodle
3) German shepherd
4) Golden retriever
5) Doberman pinscher
6) Shetland sheepdog 7) Labrador retriever 8) Papillon 9) Rottweiler 10) Australian cattle dog 11) Welsh corgi (Pembroke) 12) Miniature schnauzer 13) English springer spaniel 14) Belgian tervure 15) Schipperke, Belgian sheepdog 16) Collie, keeshond 17) German shorthaired pointer 18) Flat-coated retriever, English cocker spaniel,
standard schnauzer 19) Brittany 20) Cocker spaniel 21) Weimaraner 22) Belgian malinois, Bernese mountain dog 23) Pomeranian 24) Irish water spaniel 25) Vizsla 26) Cardigan welsh corgi 27) Chesapeake bay retriever, puli, Yorkshire terrier 28) Giant schnauzer 29) Airedale terrier, bouvier des flandres 30) Border terrier, briard 31) Welsh springer spaniel 32) Manchester terrier 33) Samoyed 34) Field spaniel, Newfoundland, Australian terrier, American
Staffordshire terrier, Gordon setter, bearded collie 35) Cairn terrier, kerry blue terrier, Irish setter 36) Norwegian elkhound 37) Affenpincher, silky terrier, minature pinscher, English setter,
pharoah hound, clumber spaniel 38) Norwich terrier 39) Dalmatian 40) Soft-coated wheaten terrier, Bedlington terrier, fox terrier
(smooth) 41) Curly-coated retriever, Irish wolfhound 42) Kuvasz, Australian shepherd 43) Saluki, Finnish spitz, pointer 44) Cavalier King Charles spaniel, German wirehaired pointer,
black and tan coonhound, American water spaniel 45) Siberian husky, bichon frise, English toy spaniel 46) Tibetan spaniel, foxhound (English), otterhound, foxhound
(American), greyhound, wirehaired pointing griffon 47) West Highland white terrier, Scottish deerhound 48) Boxer, great dane 49) Dachshund, Staffordshire bull terrier 50) Alaskan malamute 51) Whippet, Chinese shar-pei, fox terrier (wire) 52) Rhodesian ridgeback 53) Ibizan hound, Welsh terrier, Irish terrier 54) Boston terrier, akita 55) Skye terrier 56) Norfolk terrier, Sealyham terrier 57) Pug 58) French bulldog 59) Brussels griffon, Maltese 60) Italian greyhound 61) Chinese crested 62) Dandie Didmont terrier, petit bassett griffon vendeen,
Tibetan terrier, Japanese chin, Lakeland terrier 63) Old English sheepdog 64) Great Pyrenees 65) Scottish Terrier, Saint Bernhard 66) Bull Terrier 67) Chihuahua 68) Lhasa Apso 69) Bullmastiff 70) Shih tzu 71) Basset houn 72) Mastiff, beagle 73) Pekingese 74) Bloodhound 75) Borzoi 76) Chow chow 77) Bulldog 78) Basenji 79) Afghan Hound
I wonder where Fundies would rank on this list. Probably somewhere between boxers and dalmations.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
This is a complete lie and fabrication. It is propaganda by rightwing doggies against leftwing hard working australian kelpies and will not be tolerated. (I am a cat lover really, so I don't really care. lol)
ReplyDeleteI am one of the few people on the planet who finds a cat's selfishness and ego to be utterly charming. ("You need light?" "Tell someone who cares." )
Check out the aussie kelpie
http://www.rarebreed.com/breeds/kelpie/kelpie.html
My best friend has a Border Collie named Maddie. She's an amazing dog - definitely the most affectionate dog I've ever met. When I come in the house, she runs up and jumps into me for about 2 minutes, trying to lick my face at all costs. Then, when I sit down, the affectionate mauling continues for another few minutes. Afterward, she usually sits on my lap until she falls asleep, and proceeds to stay there for a couple of hours, happily dozing.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend who was given a border collie puppy because having a pet is supposed to keep your blood pressure down and your interest in living high. My friend had a heart condition, and he was on a long wait list for surgery (this being Canada, and wait lists being part of the health care system).
ReplyDeleteNobody, including the breeder who gave him the pup, knew that the dog was a "senser." He could tell when my friend was going to be having some kind of difficulty caused by his heart condition, and he'd do something to make my friend sit down and take it easy for awhile (I think part of it was "being adorable" and soliciting pets and stroking -- which are as therapeutic for humans as for the animals).
The dog was a natural at it, and never needed training. And thanks to Pickwick (the dog), my friend got to live long enough to have the needed surgery, much to the surprise of the medical establishment.
Sadly, Pick died about a year later. His name appears on a small plaque on a bench in a local dog-friendly park.
I agree with the list inasmuch as it places Afghan Hound's last. Personal experience corraborates. I read the list looking for my ex-boyfriend's name for some reason. His name wasn't there, nor was "Doorknob."
ReplyDelete'German Shepard:
ReplyDeleteAlright, everyone stop where you are! Who busted the light? I SAID, "STOP WHERE YOU ARE!!!"'
That does sound like Achilles. :)
You DO look smart with your glasses on! I just look dorky with mine.
LOVE the Border Collie cartoon!!
ReplyDeleteI don't know where they rank on the doggie smarts scale, but I like any dog that snores and drools when it sleeps. I had a Basset Hound once that would sleep walk and then wake himself barking. The look on his face was priceless.
;-)
Basset Hounds are number 71 on the list.
ReplyDeleteThey are the perfect pet for those in the bible belt.
They don't risk getting shot for being smarter than their master.
...and a Basset's growly-bark baying can always be construde as a fine Southern "Ayyy-Men" at the tent revivlas. That would be another reason that would keep them from being shot by their masters.
ReplyDeleteCute doggie Nancy. Sorry I didn't see your post until today.
ReplyDeleteI had a dog once that was a mutt but had some Malamute in her I think.
Dogs rule.
I can not believe that Basset Hounds really come in at 71. I have to agree with the first commenter, it must be a lie and fabrication. It is just not possible! Either that or I just love mine so much I am blind to their stupidity... I hope it is a lie. Kirk
ReplyDelete