April 5, 2006

GEORGE CARLIN: THERE IS NO GOD


It contains foul language in case you are at work or there are kids in the room. I've had creative writer's block since my April Fool's Day post, but I'm hoping it is temporary, so by posting classics I realize I'm taking the easy way out. Oh yeah, I added a MULTIMEDIA section on my sidebar.

Thanks to God Is For Suckers for the link. If you haven't already, check that site out. It is one of the best, if not best, Atheist site on the net.

Here are some Carlin Quotes:

“Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.”

“The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music”

“If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter”

“If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else”

“I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.”

“Religion is just mind control”

Some more:

We created God in our own image and likeness.

I credit that eight years of grammar school with nourishing me in a direction where I could trust myself and trust my instincts. They gave me the tools to reject my faith. They taught me to question and think for myself and to believe in my instincts to such an extent that I just said, 'This is a wonderful fairy tale they have going here, but it's not for me.

Religion convinced the world that there's an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there's 10 things he doesn't want you to do or else you'll to to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! ...And he needs money! He's all powerful, but he can't handle money!

Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don't ask me to wear your shoes.

I finally accepted Jesus. not as my personal savior, but as a man I intend to borrow money from.

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

Ok, I might as well add this clip of George trimming down the 10 Commandments to only 2 Commandments. Again, there is some foul language:

3 comments:

  1. George Carlin is fricken hilarious... so is God is for Suckers.

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  2. apikoros baal korchoApril 05, 2006 4:17 PM

    George Carlin's words wouldn't be nearly so funny if they weren't so true. It's so incredible to hear how thoroughly thought out everything he says is; he makes a case that's hard to refute and keeps the audience laughing as he does it. I wonder how many death threats he's had so far from fundamentalist groups.

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  3. That was great! Thanks.

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