January 19, 2007

You Think Tony Soprano Was Pissed?

Remember the episode where Tony took Meadows new boyfriend Noah aside and told him to stay away from his daughter. Tony referred to him as a "charcoal briquet," because he was half black and half Jewish. I think it was the black part that really pushed Tony over the edge, but he made it clear that Meadow better just stick to dating Italians.

Many Italian homes and Jewish homes have unwritten rules that the kids grow up and marry their own kind. I'm sure it doesn't just stop with Jews and Italians, but parents from those homes tend to be the most "emotional" about the subject.

I find this to be hilarious (I use to love watching All In the Family). Though, it could be thought of an example of extreme intolerance. Either way it is comical.

This is more of an ethnic phenomena than a religious one. But I'm sure that the more religious the household is, the more extreme the "stick with your own" philosophy is taught.

My father started preaching stick with your own, but he mellowed out pretty quick. He might have been more hardcore if he took us to synagogue, but we were very secular. 3 out of 4 of us got married, and none of us to Jews.

I really can't think of any of my friends involved in a "mixed" marriage where the couple was shunned by their families. That might have happened in the old days. The lack of shunning doesn't stop the family whispering or the stigma altogether.

Of course, there are Orthodox Jews (and even secular Jews) that wouldn't even consider marrying or dating out. Again, I understand the religious Jews. In a home where one's life revolves around religion, it would be a difficult situation when bringing up kids to marry outside one's beliefs.

I don't think it is even a consideration to most Muslims to marry outside.

Ironically, Jews have a very high divorce rate in the US compared to other faiths:

Religion % have been divorced
Jews 30%
Born-again Christians 27%
Other Christians 24%
Atheists, Agnostics 21%

Note: Baptists came in at 29% and Catholics 21%.

When it is all said and done, it is the individual's choice which should be respected. The parents in the Youtube clip had every right to whine all they want (free speech), but no right to prevent a thing.


  1. What is the point of being "jewish" if "jews" don't adhere to even the basic tenets of "judaism". Seems all "jews" don't have a problem with money worshiping.

  2. Greetings,

    googled up your blog a few days ago and enjoy your views.

    Just out of curiosity, did you or your siblings go to Jewish day school growing up?

    I'm a fairly apathetic Atlanta Jew. I've always hated going to shul, but I enjoy sabbath and holiday gatherings. I too firmly support Israel, while recognizing both sides of the ME issue.

    Thanks to my dad's uncle, my bro, sis and I went to Jewish day school.

    My brother is not married, my sis and I married Jews and are raising our kids Jewish. My brother is definitely agnostic/atheist.

    Long ago, my dad told me I'd be disowned if I married outside the faith. Probably an exaggeration, but I made sure to date Jews partly 1) out of respect for the relatives that paid for my education and 2) I hate to see our culture and values lost as we assimilate into the wasp world, essentially making ourselves extinct.

    Mind you, my best friend is Jewish and married a Catholic girl, but he did try (and fail at) jdate for a few years first. I guess I think that Jews should at least *try* to stay in the faith before abandoning it.

    But it is a shame that this whole 'religion' thing is the cause of so much death and destruction.

  3. Wayne, thanks.

    Nobody in my household went to Jew school.

    Again, my philosophy is that we have one life to live and we die alone, so in the end, we ultimately should do things that make us the most happy. If appeasing your family is one thing that makes you happy, or if the thought of marrying within makes you happy, then more power to you. It is an individual choice.

    If religion didn't exist, mankind would still be fighting. The short people against the tall or the heavy against the thin. Man can come up with just about any reason to fight one another.....but the religions that want to rule the world and make everyone on the planet one of them are the most dangerous.

  4. Gosh, its grim that we have the highest divorce rate.

  5. Blimpy the blog host, won't comment on intermarriage and assimilation because he is a jew only when it serves the purpose at hand or when he wants to play the semite card. Plus he only allows favourable comments and not criticism.

  6. Pusgut missed an apostrophe:

    *Remember the episode where Tony took Meadows new boyfriend Noah aside and told him to stay away from his daughter.*

    poor guy SHOULD have went to hebrew school

  7. Rickey, I commented on mixed marriages in the post. Try some reading comprehension, and quit worrying about my punctuation. I don't use Word Perfect when I write a post. And I'm purposely not going to correct the mistake you pointed out.

    I also told you that no matter how vile your comments are, I will allow them as long as they aren't cut and paste jobs.

    I don't mind showing my readers how insane you are when you write your own material.

  8. "rickey" is getting kind of mellow, beaj.

    you're a good influence on him.

  9. Funny clip.
    Religion sure brings out the best in people, don't it?

  10. My mom married my new dad in 1967 when I was 7. He's Chinese. In the deal I got three new brothers. Within three months, I (on my own) decided to change my Viking last name to my dad's name.
    A mixed marriage that long ago was not always accepted, nor was being a Viking with a Chinese last name. Both my mom's side and my dad's side had family members who had issues with it.
    As a kid I didn't pick up on all the stuff my parents faced. Only in family conversation much later in life did some of it come out.
    Trust me BEAJ, its not only marrying outside of the religion that makes some people nuts. Thought, my second wife was a Catholic until she met me and the Church kicked her out. Her mother never could get over her daughter marrying an Agnostic.
    People sure are strange.

  11. "Trust me BEAJ, its not only marrying outside of the religion that makes some people nuts. "

    I wonder if sometimes it's not exactly the opposite. Marrying outside your faith is no big deal if you discuss it ahead of time with your partner and work out how you're going to do things. Of course, it's all well and good to do it theoretically; once the kids come, it can cause new strife because you start thinking about whether you really want the children raised this way or that way.
    On the other hand, determining you have to marry inside your faith may lead a person to marry someone that have little else in common with.
    And, arranged marriages are even worse. The cultures that practise that always crow about how successful it is but that's usually because those cultures treat women like shit in the first place.

  12. Southie, why don't you post your picture with the mons pubis on your face?

    Some of these comments sure prove what real hypocrites the *jews* really are, especially those of intermarriage and assimilation, race mixing and mongrelisation of the species.

  13. KA, it is more ethnicity than religion I think.

    Joe, yep, but if it wasn't for religion and ethnicity, tall people would shun a tall person if they married a short person.

    Southie, when you limit who your life partner pool, it only stands to reason that you increase the likelihood of unhappiness.

    Rickey, what species are you again?

  14. I say let people marry whoever they want. (Note: "Whoever" not "Whatever")

    Why should only heterosexuals be unhappy?

  15. I was wondering where all the smart trolls got to. Looks like you found one.

  16. Beepbeep: "Whomever," not "whoever." :)

    I wonder where Rickey "has went" to school.

    And I seem to be on a language-obsessed roll this morning. Maybe I should go back to bed.

  17. Gary:

    See if you can find out who the fossil the guy in the monkey suit on Mikey Comb's profile pic is. It is also a good day for you to GFY.

  18. Looky, looky, here; us religious wack jobs get married and stay married in the highest percentage. Must be a vast right wing conspiracy to offend the secularists.

  19. Um MZ, it is the secularists that have the lower divorce rates.

    Jews have amongst the highest, they rank right up there with Fundy Christians.

  20. That's because the Jews are the most secular and liberal of people. However, I guess I missed the part where atheists have the lowest divorce rate of any group...kind of surprising I must admit if those figures are correct.

  21. I can't find stats on Orthodox Jew divorce rates, but a reason they might be higher than Atheist rates is that Atheists don't have a religious gun to their head to get married, and may live together for years withou marrying. So a fewer percentage of Atheists may in fact get married to begin with.
    But pressures to marry for religious reasons could lead to unhappy marriages.
    One thing I read was that interfaith marriages have a 50% higher chance of divorce.
    I wonder if an Atheist and Agnostic marriage would be considered interfaith.

  22. Back to the radio clip, I thought the Jewish dad sounded more Italian than the would be boyfriend of the daughter.

    I didn't face the mixed religious problem because I was formerly Catholic and my Filipina wife is Catholic. I went along with the baptism thing for my kids for the sake of conformity, but it ends there as far as I am concerned. No catechism, communion or confirmation for my kids.

  23. Have you seen this article, Bacon?


  24. Tommy, is your wife still a believer? I'm pretty sure my wife doesn't believe anymore, but I really don't want to get into a long conversation with her about it:)

    Cat, yes I saw that yesterday. Even Orthodox Jews can be mentally ill.

  25. Why don't you post your newer pics that show the Tijuana chow pass on your face.

  26. Bacon, my wife has become something of a lapsed Catholic. She claims she still believes, but she does not go to church anymore, she hasn't gone to a mass in years. She knows what I am. I explain things to her.

    A couple of times she mentioned to me about her co-workers talking about how the Jews killed Jesus, and I explain to her that he was crucified by the Romans, and that even if some Jews in Jerusalem wanted Jesus killed, (1) you can't blame an entire nation of people and their descendants for it, and (2) since Jesus was supposed to die so he could become resurrected, then the Jews should be thanked instead of blamed.

    The only way I see any potential problem is if her relatives start pestering her about our kids having their communion. Right now, I am just staying silent about the whole thing and hoping it will pass by unnoticed.

  27. Tommy, if you really want to tell the way it is, tell her that the Jesus story was most likely 100% myth.
    And when it was finally jotted down (200 or so years after "the fact", the Christians who wrote the bible, were sucking up to the Romans who were kicking their butts, but were if anything, hostile towards Jews who refused to buy into the Christ story. This led to Jews being portrayed as the murderers, while Roman were sort of let off the hook somewhat.
    The NT was written to damn the Jews.

  28. Ditto. From a historical standpoint, it's preposterous to believe that Pontius Pilate, a brutal dictator, was somehow all wimpy and wishy washy when it came to this Jesus character, and he decided to let the Jews decide his fate.

    The Jews didn't kill their own, and especially not by crucifixion.

    But the scared wimps that wrote the NT kicked off the whole 'lets blame the Jews!' mentality, that continues to this day.

  29. Yeah, I know that Bacon. I don't think my wife is ready to handle the Jesus never existed argument. I figured I would work my way up to it by gradually challenging her beliefs when we talk about these things.

  30. You have to remember that the first Christians were Jews. Before Christianity, there was a division between Jews followed everything by the book and Jews who were more open to other influences. Jesus' teachings represented following the heart of the law rather than the letter of the law, and he was critical of the Pharisees. It is quite possible that the first anti-Jew attitudes were from the Jews who opted to follow Christ's teachings - the first Christians. By that time, they just couldn't criticize one group, such as the Pharisees, they criticized the "Jews", because these Christ-following Jews had to distinguish themselves from the non-believers in Christ. Anyway, that's my take. As far as the statistics go, there are many non-practitioners or non-believers among those who consider themselves "Catholic" or "Jewish", so we really don't know what the stats reflect in terms of people's private beliefs that are really behind the way they conduct themselves in relationships. Religious "affiliation" just means that, it doesn't say anything about one's private behavior and practices.