March 28, 2007

God Mysteriously Appears In My Latest Youtube Video

And apparently God is a straight purple (or violet) light and he is living in my attic.

I did this video a couple of nights ago in my bathroom. Now, I know I didn't see a purple light while filming. Yet, when I uploaded the video to Youtube, the purple light apparently was coming down from my attic and through the light bulb, and it stayed for the entire time I filmed.

I made the video as a response to why I make Atheist related Youtube videos, and why my blog is Atheist related. God must be trying to give me a sign. Ok, here is the video and please take my word for it, the purple light was not there. I swear to Darwin, I did not do this on purpose
:


Maybe God doesn't want me preaching about an ancient earth and evolution. He knows my blog and videos might influence young Fundies or people with open minds. Maybe he just wanted to see me shave. Maybe he was checking out the Shick Quattro. But I didn't see any hair in the light. Maybe he wants the Quattro for his wife or girlfriend. Maybe it is for his male lover. I better watch what I say about God for now on. He might be a wrathful light.

I'm still not 100% that the purple light is God, but what other explanation could there be?

21 comments:

  1. I don't know what the hell you were talking about, but you could have sold me a razor.

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  2. Hahahahahahaha! I knew it wouldn't be long before God would reveal himself to you. It's a little creepy that he chose to do so in your bathroom, though. Then again, he does have quite a sense of humor.

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  3. I think you must have been listening to a Prince album.

    I have a post at my blog, I'd like your comments on.

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  4. Ask someone who knows about light and its refractive properties. That person isn't me.

    The other solution is that the neighbours who live above you were having an 80's disco revival party and they bored a small hole in the ceiling just to piss you off.

    And of course, it could have been Amon-Ra bathing you in his warm benevolent sunlight in thanks for you leading the pagans away from their false religions. This also accounts for the slightly royal purple hue of the light. ;)

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  5. The light is the ozone generator your goy wife bought to help with your BO.

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  6. god's message is to shave that nasty patch on your bottom lip. jesus! No wonder your wife won't get down with you.

    the multitasking is seriously disturbing. and where did you have the camera, in the can?

    if I was a xian, i'd probably join a mission after watching that vid.

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  7. I saw the purple light and waited for the stripper to come out. What happened?

    XaurreauX

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  8. The Flamingo, $10.99 Canadian, 4 razors (3 razor bonus) and battery included.

    Cat, I'm wondering if the light would still be there if I was doing number two, or number 3.

    Renegade, you should have said short story instead of post. But as you know, I commented.

    BeepX2, I don't have anyone living over me except for angels, or maybe squirrels in the attic. I heard something up there a week ago. Maybe they are working on some kind of squirrel Joooo ray.

    Bookjunky, the camera was on some of my wife's counter crap. I don't know what any of that stuff does, but I know there is lots of bottles and shit.

    Xaurreaux, if I saw the light, I would probably have been at a strip joint instead of shaving and filming myself. But I've yet to.

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  9. BEAJ:

    Four blades and a vibrator? C'mom man, that sooooo last century! SIXTEEN BLADES AND A LAWNMOWER, that's the new black.

    G-d will get you over this. He/she/it/FSM might moves in mysterious ways, but "thingy" will get you in the end. It might be several flights/planes/lives/ upwards or downwards but that light was just a sign from G-d in light bulb form.

    And you're Jewish. You should be sporting al long beard, you hear? This shaving lark has just lost you quite a few brownie points. Repent now: you can't have your (flying) spaghetti (monster) and eat it too! Not repenting may have the most unusual consequences: you might win the jackpot in the lottery tomorrow and think you've gotten away with it but "thingy" WILL find you, sooner or later. Break a leg, man!

    Good video!

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  10. The corpulent kousfaced blog host has no intention of keeping kosher. He did the biggest no no of all; intermarriage and assimilation.

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  11. It's a defect in the magnet reader in the camera. Hardly God... but you've sold me a razor, lol.

    Rev. Pasha

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  12. God is camera shy. He has a public image problem. I suggest he get a new spin doctor.

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  13. Beware, BEAJ. You think it's the Lord (or maybe his son & proxy, Sweet Lamb Jeebus), but that's just what Satan wants you to think!

    The Lord would never show up unannounced in the form of something so unrefined & vulgar as a purple stream of light. And in a bathroom of all places. The Lord would be a burning bush, or a cyclone, or a disembodied voice emenating from all four walls simultaneous-like.

    No sir, this purple light can only be The Dark One (in light form! You see? He's tricky). Be very afraid, BEAJ. Once the Dark Prince has you in his sights, it's very hard to get rid of him. Watch out for lions and serpents and whales, and other strange & unexpected animal visitors.

    I think an exorcism is in order. Send me a check for $5,000 and I think I can hook you up.

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  14. My daughter's friend who believes in ghosts would say that is the spirit of your dead grandmother or someone.

    Hey...it could be an alien coming to observe your hygeine habits!

    You have such a great sense of humor!

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  15. I'm wondering if the light would still be there if I was doing number two, or number 3.
    Ummm...newsflash: the rest of us do #1's, or #2's.
    Unless there's something you're not telling us? If that's the case, NO, WE DON'T WANT A VIDEO, thanks much. It might be a big hit overseas, though.
    ;)

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  16. Maybe a number 3 is "secret women's business."

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  17. from what you just posted, i don't think you're an atheist at all..you talk as if God really exists

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  18. Hi Lorraine. Your satire detector is really low on batteries.

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  19. Agree with lorraine, you must be a believer.

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  20. Joaquin, you are jokin, right?

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