October 12, 2005

ARK RANT

How can anyone and I mean anyone believe in the Great Flood and Noah's Ark?
There are approximately 4500 species of mammals on this earth right now, 3,500 amphibian species, 5,550 hundred reptiles, 10,000 species of birds(oh wait, birds could have flown around until they needed to rest and perch on the Ark, well, except ostriches and penguins and other flightless fowl), and over 1 million species of insects.
Oh yeah, let's multiply all these guys by two (they needed to reproduce to keep their lines going). Of course if Noah was smart he would have only taken pregnant females. I don't what is worse to take care: a pregnant crocodile or a couple of sex hungry crocs(wait, there are more than one species of crocs. I know this because I watch the Crocodile Hunter).
Noah must have been one heck of a biologist and animal trainer to be able to find all these animal species and then lure them on the Ark. Did he tranq hippos, lions, and elephants? How did he handle the skunk? It is pretty tought to catch a few of the animals that exist today. How do you catch a croc, or a hippo, or a giraffe for that matter? I'm cracking up writing this.
The Ark had to be massive to handle all this, and what about the poop and urine from just the mammals alone? Don't they have to go at least once a day? Yech.
And I know they had 8 people to maintain all these animals. Let's say they fed them twice a day. For the mammals alone, that would be 18,000 meals each day. It is humanly impossible to do work that hard. That is over 2,000 meals given out by each human on the Ark every day for mammals alone. Where did they keep the food?
And lets not forget about strict diets. Again, Noah had to have vast knowledge of every animals diets. Lots of these animals require certain types of foods to live, like the Koala for example. And we have to assume that no animals died, or they wouldn't be around today. So they must have had impeccable care and they had to have eaten their food and be disease free.
Now for the good part. Let's say the Ark was built in Asia, Africa, or Europe. Where are the kangaroo bones from kangaroos who lived prior to the flood assuming Noah let them off in Australia after the storm?
And people believe this crap.

5 comments:

  1. Folowed your link from Yahoo boards, I agree, I am so sick of jerks who are too stupid to figure out the Metric System and buy the I.D. crappola lecture us about how Global Warming is untrue.

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  2. I really didn't get into a metric system rant.

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  3. If you watch the Crocodile Hunter, then you should know how to catch a croc.

    Personally, if I were to know that it would rain that long, I would purposely drown because I can't stand it when it is cloudy for over 3 days straight. There's no way I would have made it for 40 days or however long it rained.

    If God told me that it would rain for 40 days and I was to build this gigantic arc, round up all those animals, and take care of them while the entire Earth was flooded, I would have ran to the nearest watering hole and taken a few deep breaths.

    Meanwhile, I am back to blogging. Thanks for reminding me to get with it.

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  4. God would never ask me to build an Ark. I can barely make a bed. That fourth corner is very tricky.

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  5. Tuck in the entire bottom of the sheet first. Then lift up the fold on each bottom corner to tuck in the over hang....you are left with a very tidy corner.

    As far as I know, you don't even need the metric system.

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