June 13, 2005


I still think I'm in my early 20's, but I'm not. Maybe it has to do with not having any children. Maybe it is because I've always been into horse racing. Maybe it is because I haven't done much interacting with friends in person the last 4 years. Maybe it is the internet. Maybe it has to do with riding a bike.
I still have dreams that I'm in my 20's. I've dated a lot of chicks the last few months in my dreams. I have hair on the top of my head in those dreams too, and I'm sometimes married and sometimes separated and sometimes single.
Sometimes I'm in high school or university. It is like a Twilight Zone episode. When I go to sleep, I usually travel back in time.
Getting back to being 44. I may look it, but I don't feel it, until I actually do something too physical that is.

June 4, 2005


Wasn't it the Mormons who God (portrayed as some kind of amphibian) said was the right religion on Southpark. In fact God was a Buddhist in that show. That is such a funny concept.
The reason I'm even mentioning this is that whenever I see really religious people on TV (mostly Christians) they seem to have this gleam in their eyes and have complete faith in Christ and God. I'm still not sure if Christ is God or the son of God or both, or sometimes he's the son of God and sometimes he is the Lord. It is very confusing, even for someone as unbelievably intelligent as myself.
I'm not picking on Christians here. Many religious Jews believe the Chosen stuff. Many will say they don't, many don't. Many do. In fact, many unreligious Jews think Jews are the one, but not for relgious reasons obviously but because of survival, a commitment to family and education, etc.
The point is every religious person think they are right. Of course, this is impossible. And it usually boils down to ones birthright. If someone is born to Mormon parents, they will tend to believe Mormonism is 100% right, if they have Jewish parents, then it is Judaism baby, Muslim parents: Allah is number one, and so on.
Think about it, this is just craziness when it comes down to it.
Of course there are those who convert into a religion. Many do so not so much because they think that the religion they are converting to is the right one, most of the time it is due to social factors. There are exceptions of course. But because people sincerely pick Islam, Judaism, Catholicism, Mormonism, OK not Mormonism, how could anyone not born to Mormon parents possibly choose that one for fundamental reasons?
Anyways, even I think I'm right. No god, and religion is just a way to try to make sense of life while hoping desperately for an afterlife, while the leaders try to brainwash and control their flock.
I guess I'm just as guilty as a Mormon, who thinks he has the right beliefs. Although I became an Atheist very honestly and it was a rational choice in my Never Humble Opinion.